Lovers Games

Ladies, I'm about to introduce you to a life changing game.

Here's the deal. Whenever your man gives you a compliment try to find a way to twist his words and take offense. For example, he might say "You look really pretty today." (Compose yourself. Take a moment to remember that these words are not to be enjoyed.) Remembering this admonition you say "Ohhh, so you're saying I look like a fat slob every other day!?!"

For maximum effectiveness leave the room in a huff.

This game is a really neat way to get your lover to really dig deep and explain all the many ways he loves you. It keeps him on his toes and is a fun time for all involved.

That tear you see in his eye after the game...that tear...that's there because he feels so lucky to have you.

Can't wait to hear how this works out for you guys! XOXO

A Day At Daybreak

Brandon has been traveling tons lately.  

He's been in New York, Orlando, and Palm Springs, the last three weeks, and Vegas this week, so it's nice to have him home for a couple of days.  

We spent our Sunday together as a family exploring the neighborhood where his parents live, Daybreak.  We fed ducks, looked for frogs, rolled down the grass hills until we got so cold we just had to go.  

Here are my Instagrams from the day.  

(If we aren't already Insty friends, find me @ lolo_elle)

Happy Monday everyone.  Hope your weekend was wonderful too.  

Schminter

What's it called again when you lack motivation to do things you normally enjoy, feel hopeless, and want to stay in bed all day?

Oh yes, winter.  :)

That is precisely why I couldn't be happier that it's over. (Even though it snowed yesterday). I honestly feel like a new person.

Hurray for spring, choosing to shove away negative thoughts, and conquering today.

And an even bigger hurray for my boo, vitamin d. A.K.A. the sun.

Phonaphobia

People who leave me voicemails instead of texting me: why do you hate me so much?

*With the exception of people who sing/rap me their message. Obviously you guys love me, and I love you back.

Don't hate me, I'm phonophobic. It's doctor diagnosed. Or not, but whatever.

The Paps Be Hounding Me

Sometimes I wish I was a celebrity so that when I got bored all I'd have to do is walk out of the house without my wedding ring on and the paparazzi would be like:

"Laurel, is your marriage on the rocks!?",

"Did Brandon leave you for another woman?",

"Who are you wearing?" (How insensitive of them to ask me something so shallow at time like that. Right? Ugh...Those paps...)

And I'd be like "I'm not saying a word until someone brings me a crunch wrap supreme and a diet coke." And then they'd make a run for the border for me and we'd have a nice conversation over 4th meal.

That'd be the life.

I'm A Lady

Brandon had to take a business trip to Vancouver BC a couple weeks ago and I had to get away. So what do you do when the stars align in such magnificent form? You go on a getaway with your husband that makes you feel crazy, sexy, and cool. Whaaaat!?

I spent most of my time alone relaxing and exploring while he was at a convention.  

I had time to remember what it's like to think my own thoughts without interruption, spend time getting dressed up, order room service while watching Beyonce's documentary, you know, basically doing things that aren't playing house.

Seriously, the best.

I cruised around those Vancouver streets without a care in the world. I felt alive and exhilarated, and dare I say hot. I mean, you guys, not only did I spend like an hour getting ready but before I went out I took a long bath AND snuck a beauty rest/power nap in.  So of course I felt good. I was practically living my own version of JLo's life.  Okay, maybe not.  But whatever.

I was feeling so confident while shopping on the ever so popular Robson street that I wasn't at all surprised when some guy approached me with some "phony" excuse to hit on me.  He was pretty good looking and really friendly.  

We were talking about where I was from and what I was doing that night as I waited for the light to turn green so I could cross the street.  All I kept thinking is "Oh man, I hope this doesn't get awkward.  Can he see my wedding ring?  Make your wedding ring more visible.  He's staring at me.  Clearly I've still got it."  

We had a brief conversation, and as the light turned green I proceeded towards the corner.  This was the moment we'd part ways nicely or I'd have to break the news to him that I am T-A-K-E-N.  Taken. 

I quickly, mentally prepared for the worst.  I'd let him down easy.  We'd laugh about it for a second then walk away.  

Those preparations were all in vain, because when he turned to me and smiled, he uttered the most disgusting words in the english language.  

You know the ones.  

He looked me in the eyes and said "Have a nice day ma'am".

"haaabaaaandyouutooo" Is all I could mutter in response.  Jibberish.

I'm lucky I didn't fall to the ground, get struck by a car and left for dead.  

Did he just call me ma'am!?  I know he didn't just call me ma'am.  He just called me ma'am.  This dude who I assumed was my peer just mistook me for a ma'am.  Clearly I'm not a ma'am.  Am I a ma'am?

Turns out he was just reaching out to a lonely old lady and I was that ma'am.  

And ya know what, I suppose thats not so bad. 

(Not really.  Don't be an idiot.  If you call me ma'am and you're older than 12 years old, you're getting punched.  Next time I'll be prepared.)

Thanks for the reality check friendly gentleman.

Am I the only one that hates the "m" word?